Get The F@*& Out Mr Deputy President!

The face of a homophobe and his 'sucks at running a country' best friend
Img source: The Star Kenya
The face of a homophobe and his 'sucks at running a country' best friend Img source: The Star Kenya

The face of a homophobe and his ‘sucks at running a country’ best friend
Img source: The Star Kenya

This initially appeared on this date on the Story Moja website.The original article is gone but we’d like to republish it here, 2 years later because the DP is still an absolute idiot and he might win again.
*trigger warning*

His breath was hot and heavy as he grunted into her ear. his friends held her arms down as he groaned and whispered between grunts You’ve heard that there’s no space for your kind here. We’ll show you a good time so you can learn what it is to be with a man.

All over the world we hear about this. From Ecuador where they have special clinics  for converting lesbians to nice proper women using rape and torture (this despite them having legalised same sex unions), to Uganda where its less organised but still as brutal. Where people who are of different sexual orientations are targeted for ‘fixing’. Just recently in Nigeria a man violated his son with a heating coil and Kenyans were out on the internet doing their usual fuckery by supporting him. When I first saw people on twitter quoting the DP saying that there wasn’t any space for homosexuals in the country I was pretty sure guys were quoting one of those dodgy blogs which would kill off Lucy Kibaki every few months, are convinced that the president is bi-sexual and have evidence that Profit(not a typo) Owuor is direct cousins with the Virgin Mary who actually appeared as he got his Doctorate in Bullshit and Fleecing Gullible People. You know the kind of blogs I’m talking about, even Ghafla wouldn’t stoop to their level. My co-worker actually asked what else he had f*cked up so bad that he had to deflect attention away from it by pleasing the religious fundamentalists with such an utterly backward statement.

gay kenya

“In Kenya, the Constitution is supreme, and it requires conduct to be justified in terms of laws that meet the constitutional standard. The state has to act within the confines of what the law allows, and cannot rely on religious texts or its views of what the moral and religious convictions of Kenyans are to justify the limitation of a right,” The Kenya High Court judges Monday 27th April

 

“We would stand with religious leaders to defend our faith and our beliefs. We would not allow homosexuality in our nation, as it violates our religious and cultural beliefs,” Deputy President William Ruto Sunday 3rd May a week later.

 

This Mensa candidate is convinced gay people spend their days plotting to convert children to faggotry

This Mensa candidate is convinced gay people spend their days plotting to convert children to faggotry

Im pretty sure hate speech is basically an expression of information or a line of thought that incites prejudicial treatment against a group of people who are defined by a common discriminatory trait such as…an alternative sexual lifestyle. In Kenya this usually involves political motivation or something of the sort but Mr DP was in a church and you know how much Kenyan and African politicians understand that the minute the hymns stop its time to gather those votes from the Jesus people. I once heard  from a friend God hates gays? But he’s apparently very fond of self righteous hypocritical hate mongers.

 

So whats next for the Deputy President, since his opinions are above the law and human rights seem to be whole new thing to him. Who will his next target be in the campaign against different people be? The Somali people have already been a target, the reason for them leaving their homeland conveniently forgotten in this plan to get rid of different people. Maybe this will be his next speech:   

 

The lord created mankind with two eyes to see, one mouth to speak, two ears to hear, two arms to hold, two legs to walk and boy/girl parts that fit together. Are there those that do not conform to this? There are deaf, blind and paralysed people in the country? Men and women who don’t use their boy and girl parts with the opposite sex? Chuck em into Mombasa harbour before they infect us with their difference. This thing of recognising everyone’s human rights is a Western concept and is un-african!

 

pfft Get The Fuck Out Mr DP.
The content of this post is purely fictional and was in no way meant to undermine the authority of The Office of The Deputy President. It was in fact paid for by Fox News, CNN, leftist churches in the West, communists, Disney, Obama, The Clintons, Osama, Monica Lewinsky, The Fairy God Mother, Yo Mamma, Snoop Dogg and individuals in the buttocracy and fagarchy (I swear those are real worlds) who are trying to undermine African ideals that have only existed since the Western world invaded our continent.

Adam Kiboi
Adam
Writer & Marketeer at | | + posts

Adam Kiboi is a writer and marketer who just wants everyone to get their fair share, especially creatives. When he's not trying to figure out the creative scene he's running around barefoot in a kikoy trying to farm and failing. He regularly makes up words so don't bother with your dictionary. He receives complaints concerns and marriage proposals via twitter @adamkiboi

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